I want to do things with my life but I also want to bury myself in a forest and let the moss grow over me so where does that leave us
if i was famous i would just knock on peoples doors and be like hello yes its me
tv show. white man. hes sad. he has to do important thing but its hard. his girlfriend died probably. TWSIT!! theres another white man. maybe MORE. hes sad too but for different reason. its very deep probably. theyre best friends but not gay but maybe they are haha fandom!!! every girl dies or goes away. just not gay white man friend. 10 seasons 100 million viewers. what will moody white men do this week.
so i feel like i should tell you guys that i’ve found the formula for a perfect and incontrovertible insult:
you perfectly rectangular shitbowl!
you obscenely lamentable assbasket!
you fantastically nauseating dicksoiree!
go forth and blaspheme
people who laugh so hard at their own jokes that they can’t even finish the joke because they’re laughing so hard are my favorite kind of people
this looks like one of those informercials
Yawning snakes are literally the most adorable thing on this planet.
OH MY GOD I’M GONNA CRY
Justin Bieber’s legal representation.
I keep saying I’ll stop reblogging these things but then something funnier happens.
[My boyfriend] is honestly my best friend, and hopefully I’m his best friend too. He’s my favorite person to be around and makes me laugh harder than anybody…We can eat Cheetos and watch beach volleyball and we turn into two perverted Homer Simpsons, like, ‘Oh, she’s got a nice ass.’ I never thought we’d have such different opinions on asses.